Monday, September 1, 2008

Embracing Accusations



Today marks one month in VA and no work. This is has been an interesting month as I have had a great time living each day with my husband, coming and going to the coffee shop, reading, praying, running and resting. I felt the Lord said to me that August would be for him. That I would not have a job and that I should embrace the time I had with him and those he put before me. So I have.
And wouldn't you know it, as it often goes, today I am in that place where I am feeling a waste. I know full well that the Lord has a plan, he ALWAYS does. I know that he has provided and I have no reason to fear. But what a blow to my pride and what I am finding that I can often find my worth in. It is hard to know that I am a valuable worker. I have experience in life and work that most do not. Nevertheless, I do not have a masters so I am automatically in a lower pay scale. Top that off with a degree in Behavioral Sciences and I am at a loss for any real financial wealth to come through my doors.
So today I am battling the thoughts of the enemy, thoughts of failure and lack or worth and remembering the work the Lord has already done in and through me. That there is more to what I can see and even what I can see is so much more. I am bathing myself in the word and listening to Shane and Shane's album PAGES. This is an encouraging album. This can speak my heart and lead me into a time of worship and fear of the Lord. Nothing more and nothing less. Thank you Lord.

1 comment:

Unknown said...

Love the moment you have been given to rest and relish where you are.

I have been where you are and I found it so very hard to accept that I based so much of my worth on being a "Productive" member of society aka job holder. But I also found these amazing days when I could just spend time reading and praying and meditating on scripture that I don't have when I have a job. I didn't do anything influential during that time out of the workforce but I did get recharged and realigned some of my priorities that needed to be tended to.

Rest, and enjoy this brief time in your life when you have more time than things to do.