Dig the photo of me...yeah I'm a mother of a almost one year old!! ha. SO CRAZY! I can't believe she is almost 1!!! They say it goes fast and it does.
So this last year more changes have happened. I mean every year for the last three something major has happened. 2007 I moved to Nashville, 2008 I married my best friend, 2009 I had my baby girl and now 2010 we bought our first home! I cannot believe it, I own a home!! Well technically the bank owns it but details details...ha.
But all that to say the last few years have taken a toll on me. Its just now that I am able to to take a look and see what that means. Moving to Nashville was one of the best decisions Ive ever made. I loved my time there, made some great friends and some wonderful memories. I married my best friend and left with positive thoughts and feelings for all the ups and downs that year possessed. Then the move to Lynchburg in 2008 was a mind twist. I moved to a town where I knew no one. This was Ryan's old stomping ground so it was a challenge to find myself here. There was the struggle of finding a job, finding a church, finding friends...then came the news of our baby! What does this mean to have a baby when everything else was so new and out of sorts?
But the Lord has a way of working things out...I got a job, I met some lovely ladies and well our search for the church was still in process but hopeful.
The end of 2009 we had our little girl and thoughts of a our home on the horizon. It was then that things really got a bit hard. I was no longer working. I was a full time mom. And the girls I had really connected with had some changes of their own which took them away from this town and so on...
The beginning of 2010 I was happy and sad at the same time. I missed my closest friends. The ones that lived far away were living lives that were/are different from mine. It was hard. Ryan working so hard to provide. I was feeling lost. I had no idea where "Nicci" went.
Then I realized I just had to work a bit harder.
Things worked themselves out by mid summer. We moved into our new home! I had an amazing weekend with some of my closest and dearest friends to celebrate my bff. I started running which took care of that need to be physically active. I met some more great ladies here in town...one in particular who has a son the same age as lily and just moved here from Knoxville. And finally we found a church!!!
So slowly but surely I am learning more about Nicci as a wife, mother, daughter and friend. This year feels like it has been the hardest in a lot of ways. Mainly learning to love solitude. Adjusting to having this much alone time has been a good lesson for me. I have had to face allot of things about myself that Ive been avoiding for some time. And though hard it isn't as bad as I thought it would be...but I can say that on this side of the journey.:)
In closing here are my lessons:
Being a full time mom is hard, rewarding but hard. Don't let anyone tell you it isn't a full time job. It is.
Being a wife also hard. but also one of the best things I've done! Having a support system makes all of life that much easier to embrace.
I miss dancing! But running has been a good replacement for the time being.
I love my friends. Meaningful relationships are the best. But being a mom and a wife I have little time and I will not chase after you to be my friend.
owning a home is amazing!
I don't have it all figured out.
I am easily distracted.
I still have wounds that aren't as healed as I thought.
I have allot more lessons to learn.
